NOTE TO MYSELF

have you heard about a bird symbolized as a freedom? *smile.

I don't why, but I doubt that... because 

is it really truly real that in the birds heart they feel free?

I don't know...we don't know.

it's just like human..we symbolies as a perfect freedom form in this earth.. but still.. you've got no idea how others really truly feel... 

all this things makes me realize, that.. at the time that we feel free.. is really the time that have to enjoy it... either good to be alone or with someone, but. how good do we really want to be free? 

there isn't danger to be good at single...so sad in your ways that you'll miss out in the change to be with somebody great? 

some people take baby steps to settle down, some people refuse to settle at all.. sometimes it just chemistry.

and sometimes Larry... just because it is over, doesn't mean the love ends.

the thing about being single is.... you should cherish it, because in a week or alive time being alone you only get one moment.. one moment when youre not tight on relationship with anyone. one moment when you stand on your own... really truly free... *happy crying

 

in between menopost and seventen.

don't you ever feel like you're getting back to seventen at some moments?!

gosh! I thought it only in the movies, but it came to me!!! 

so I just broke up with bae... 

it feel sooo much in hurt! maybe it's because my first time... my first time that I felt loved by someone... that finally after 22 years in my life, someone invest their heart to look after each other! 

at the stage, our relationship is really mature, I kept understanding with the situations, now as I look back again!.. it seems the relationship is really good,... I mean we're happy together... but more often is just not what I excpected! 

I thought at first I don't like bae... and now! I love bae after we broke up... like insanely crazy in love!

this situation shouldn't be in here...it should be when I was SEVENTEN!! 

I am tottaly freakin 22!!! keep it head up... ugh! 

while I am having this problem, I should do more important things,... but I can't! I kept being drama selfish asshole who just focus on nothing..yea! your 

freaking fucking broken heart!! 

sometimes I just thinking... "why the world has to be cruel to my love life?" like seriously... it litteraly came up to me... like what should I do to my life while having this broken heart? 

I want to be mature, wise and keep it simple.... I always put that on my mind... 

but not in heart! so stupid Larry! ugh... I hate me! a lot! 

I wish I could be the person who easly ignore people and expect nothing in this universe... so they can't hurt me... at all!

Thank you love.... for runing my heart, my day, my time, and my life... but seriously! I am fucking love you always .... like I did to my "almost bae" .... SW