Happy New Year

Tahun baru sebentar lagi tiba...

menghirup hari baru di bulan baru dan di tahun yang baru,,,

aku beridiri di atas genting rumah

menunggu bunyi ledakan besar di sekitar rumahku

Tahun baru sebentar lagi tiba 

melangkah di hari baru, di bulan baru dan di tahun yang baru...

Sekarang ledakan itu telah di lepaskan  

apa yang kau harapkan di hari yang baru, di bulan baru dan di tahun yang baru...?

Semoga saja kejutan di tahun yang baru ini penuh dengan warna 

seperti ledakan-ledakan yang sedangku perhatikan di sekeliling rumahku.

Selamat tahun baru 2015

Problem it never ends

so...its been since I've met you in the last couple semester in college...

it's not strange, it's...comfy 

you make me comfy talking to you...and all sudden became closer and closer

we don't put a label between us...

it's crazy, suddenly this person stick it with someone else

But this person won't forget about me...

its so complicated..

I get drunk on jealousy

this person get mad, but this person always turning back...

sometimes I do force to make this person like me...

I hate this person but I love this person in the same way.

Future oh Future

Hey everyone.
So, a lot happen in this week... that make me re-thinking again "what do I want in this life"

in the begin, my plan is :

1. Graduate College and life in Los Angeles
Because, at least If I have degree I can have a work using a tittle as an Art Student Alumni.. or whatever it's called. anyway back to the topic. so I have been thinking...
Is LA the best think that makes you happy !?
to be honest... yes in the last couple years ago, but now... I don't think so
I still thinking what should I do, when I graduate....?

2. Have a perfect job (Living the dream)
Everyone is always wanted that... so am I
but...What is my perfect job !?, Is became a filmaker makes me living the dream ?
to be honest...yes in the last couple years ago, but now.... I don't think so
my heart is still "won't move" and still find it...

3. Living happily ever after with my partner
heh..."Partner" 
This is so confusing. for the last couple years. I really wanted to be with someone and have a partner.
but... Is it really want a partner ?! Can you make your partner happy ? is relationship is the best solution not to be "lonely" ?
To be honest...yes in the last couple years ago, but now....I don't think so
I am starting enyoing my life as a "Single" and I am feeling good being alone.

Everythig has change...
I should thinking again...what the future will be ?

Another daily activity in hoilday

Holiday...I am not just doing reading, writing. gw juga mengalami kind of stupid trouble.

LOVE.
yeaaah I'm tired of always telling my stupid love life. 
I can't tell who is it I am in love. but its really make me sad.
I am an emotionaly person. I don't know, I am cappicorn anyway. haha
  
I've never been in relationship. (maybe its one but its not count)
I've always fail in phase "Getting To Know Each Other". 
Its been 3 years I want a relationship (since 17). 
My life change since in high school, but I'm not saying that its not good. Its good somehow

But in 19 years old I realized something. I want a relationship because I am jealous.
I am jealous to the people who can be able to start a relationship, I am jealous because seeing people in relationship giving love to each other and its so warm and loving. 
That's make me realize that, jealous is never a good in any different of level. 

I realize that when you have a relationship. Are you able to start it, because your jealous ? after your jealousy is gone, are you satisfy ? is jealous the right commitment to start a relationship ?
I realize when you jealous seeing people in relationship, its because you never realize that love is closer that you think. friends, your mom is always there for you... and that was true love. 
you will be in relationship, but not now, Not because your jealous, but you will be in relationship in the right time and the right pleace.

So, that was my another activity in my holiday.
P:S: Thank you  GOD

This is my messy room

What I am doing in the holiday

Hey guys ! how are you ? I hope you're all well...
I am in the holiday now...
day off for college about 2 and a half month.

Today I am gonna show you, what am doing when I am in the holiday.

 1. Always Looking something on internet.

I randomly always looking something interesting on internet, such as YOUTUBE, Streaming movie, and Reading some article.
well, after that I only excersice and getting lazy all day and all night LOL

 2. Read and Write

My Lecturer always say's that when you like something, be addict on it.
so I like film and I like writing. so I watch a lot and read a lot.

3. Typing and Writing

I am not really often to write a story. I often write a word or sentece, such as quotes or some dialog from the film. When I write that, I've got spirit to write and make my imagination flying away throught the word or sentence.
When I making a story I use a lap top, and when I write quotes or dialog I will use the notes to write it.

That's all I do in my holiday. I hope you like it.
thank you so much.
I am sorry for the grammer. 

RSF : Review Semester Fourth

I'am in semester 4 going to semester 5.

I've been through a lot of any kind of emotion.
I've been blessed, I can still be able to fighting for my own future.

IKJ mengajarkan gw banyak hal selama 4 semester ini.
I learned how to stay organize.
I learned how to be a perfectionist (in a good way).
I learned how to be creative with my own way.

but, gw selalu punya masalah sama sosial. people might see that I was a good social. Some people think that I can make a good conversation (The Fact is : Ettt tottaly bad). I am still less with the social.

example, kemarin gw ketemu kameramen gw waktu buat film penyutradaraan, (for my friends who read this, you must be know who is it) dan ketika gw lewat kami hanya bertatapan muka, and suddenly I felt guilty. WHY !? WHY I ACT WIERD !?. bukan hanya itu aja temen smp gw say so. what happen to me ?
gw sebenernya selalu punya cara untuk membuka kasus ini
first, I ask my friends and ask them to evaluation me
second, I try to ask the solution for that problems
Third, I am doing it the solution with my own conclusion
but I am scared. I am scared to see what people think about me.
but that still a problem who needs fix for me (give me some advise guys!)

well, not just that...4 semester leave me a lot of note.

I am not going to europe.
there so much a thing I can't tell you but, the truth is I am not going.
But, a good things happen to me. gw banyak dapet job.
jobnya pun tidaklah begitu berat, tapi dari job ini gw belajar untuk menjadi organize. gw bahagiah walaupun progress gw kecil paling tidak gw increasing something.
selanjutnya gw jadi fokus kuliah, (gw menyelesaikan kelas drama gw dengan nilai A (I LOVE DRAMA))
gw rasa itu adalah hal yang sama pas gw mendapatkan kebahagiaan kalo gw pergi ke europe.
I still feel happy and fun.

Next is, I was tottaly excited when people talk about major in college (Major: a label you will be choose to be part a filmmaker such as Scenario, Director, Producer and etc) UGH!! I am so freaking exited, can't wait to see my friends will choose in the next semester.
Also gw juga menunggu-nunggu yang namanya PRAKTIKA.

the most important note is : Selama semester 4 ini, gw dapet banyak sekali yang namanya ITJ: Istirahat Tugas Jahanam. Semester ini bener-bener menyenangkan. sampai hari ini gw belom merasakan yang namanya tugas jahanam (semenjak semester 2). tapi agak sedikit bosen juga sih. mata kuliah yang gw abis semuanya umum.
tapi overall I love semester fourth and I can't wait what story I make in semester fifth.

I will talk to you later pups!

Hey you from the future.

I've being strange to myself.
I've through a moment where the piece of me can't let go myself.
I know the limit between us.
I know the space and walls to make a distance for us.

Is there any change to us can be together?

for you my future...
I want to say, I am still waiting for you...
even world change
even time change
even people change
but my waiting for you is never changed.